Tuesday, September 11, 2012

It Seems She May Have Sprained Her Shoulder a Bit

(waiting at Urgent Care)
I gave her this necklace today when I picked her up from school.

We had had a long talk this morning about how I can't make everything fair, how her brother is just going to get to have stuff and do stuff and see stuff before she does because he's older.  I drew ladders and rungs in the air with my hands, showing her where she is and where he is, and that the ladder is really the same length. I told her that it will end up being fair, even if it doesn't feel fair right now.  

And I told her that he needs his space, and that he will enjoy her company more when she isn't always at his elbow.  

I told her that it's lucky for her that her brain is growing so much right now, and that she is finding whole new rooms in there to explore and fill with things.

I told her I know (I know, I really, really KNOW) that this is all hard, but when things were hard for me when I was her age, when I was lonely or sad or just if everything around me was too much, I would go and live inside a book for a while. I told her that Ramona and Pippi and the Melendy Family were all there waiting for me. And that when I came out of the book, everything felt more manageable, and less hurt-y.  

I told her that I believe with all my heart that Books Save Lives. 

This was a hard talk, a proper Talk, and she cried a bit, but she also told me she "liked the metaphors."

And that she loves books.

treatment: Motrin and a heating pad...

...and Ramona the Pest (in her lap)


  1. My nephews are going through this same hard time, same age difference...and I had a similar chat. The older nephew, after our chat, said, "I'm sick of people talking to me about being 'at that age'" Ha! I wish I would have read this first...forgot to give em the ol' "Books Save Lives" line. Perfect!

  2. Books absolutely save lives! Hope her shoulder is feeling better soon.

    1. For the past two years she has gone to this lovely-but-insane birthday party at a day-camp in the Santa Monica Mountains...this time they put them into some sort of person-sized hamster wheel, and I think she just caught herself the wrong way. I thought it was just strained, but -- with her history of dislocated elbows -- when it wasn't feeling any better two days later it seemed prudent to visit urgent care. She passed on gymnastics this weekend, and really seems to be on the mend. THANK YOU!

  3. Oh dear, the party sounds fun but hazardous! My little sister was the same way with elbows, once you pop one out of joint it just seems like it's so easy to have it happen again.