Tuesday, January 07, 2014

A Prescription For a Serious Case of Post-School Snark

What I forced him to read today, for half an hour, before starting his homework, in hopes that he would slough off a couple of his newer nesting doll layers and remember what it was like to be nine.
If nothing else, it bought us all half an hour of bicker-free time.

The gist of the one-sided 'conversation' I had with one of the children today (but also a conversation I have with myself, daily):

I don't care if you're hormonal.  
I don't care if you're a boy or a girl.  
I don't care if you're the older or the younger child.  
There are no excuses.  

Snarkiness is lazy.  And mean.  And hurtful.

You are bigger than that.

Yes, your feelings are real, but that means they are real enough to poison the people around you.  You may remove yourself from our company for a short while to remember or imagine being X's age, and to remember who you want to be.  



Have a good cry.  

Think of this as time in a decompression chamber, between the depths you explore with your peers, and your home on the surface.  Adjust your attitude, your tone, and your expression.  Level off, and then come back to us.

You do not always have to be right.  You do not always have to have the last word.

But you do have to mostly be kind.


  1. That sounds tough - but a sensible plan for managing it as much as possible. Is that a Charlie and Lola at the bottom of the pile - they're a current favourite in our house.

    1. Yes, lovely Ruth! double dose of Charlie and Lola TV episodes and a glass of water are also quite mood-adjusting!